Little Toot, Tiny Tim, and David Cassidy

Tuesday, April 12, 2022

I often think about my life as “Little Toot, ” the tugboat child who all the other tug boats feel is useless because he (I presume it’s a he for some reason) prefers to play and make figure 8s in the bay.  Eventually, the tugboat community forces Little Toot to leave, and he finds himself adrift in the vast sea.  I imagine myself in that role quite easily.  At one time, I was working at a bookstore, having a great time there, and eventually let go due that I love being around books, and I just wanted to play, which was my actual work there from my point of view.  Nevertheless, some disagree with my philosophy, and I was sent out adrift in the world of my imagination.

As a teenager, I briefly met the entertainer and singer Tiny Tim at a party at Billy Gray’s house in Topanga Canyon.  I was taken aback to meet him because I wasn’t sure if he existed or not.   At the time, he was a star for being on “Laugh-In, ” but also was taken as a joke due to his appearance and his somewhat eccentric mode of focusing on songs from the 1920s and beyond.  Also, he played the ukulele and sang with a falsetto/vibrato voice.  He wore white make-up, red lipstick, and long hair.  Tiny Tim sort of looked like he was borderline homeless or even insane.   So many thought he was likely to be a comedian, and he was taking the Tiny Tim character as a fictional role.   I was confused at the time.  When I met and observed him at this gathering, I could see he was genuine and not a character set up for the masses.  At the time, I purchased his first album, “God Bless Tiny Tim, ” and recalled that I liked it, and for sure, it wasn’t a joke at all.  I recently learned that he was also in Jack Smith’s “Normal Love.” Like Little Toot, Tiny Tim wasn’t accepted by his audience because he was thought of as a freak or a comic figure.  He was a genuine musical archivist and more likely one of the great minds in 20th-century music.  Yet, I feel the entertainment world abandoned him once they thought the joke was old.

It’s tough to stay true to oneself when the world either ignores or ridicules you in a fashion that yells out, ‘you’re not important.’  Yet, daily, the struggle to work or play is almost like sending a spit against the wind; it hits you repeatedly.  We are often placed in a world that is none of our makings, yet everyone demands that we operate in that landscape and do what we are told.  I remember reading about the teen idol David Cassidy and his frustration to be taken seriously, yet, his image, even his peculiar fame, worked against him.   The crisis is trying to define oneself against what others say you are.   With that in mind, whenever I put pen onto paper, it is a weapon against those who wouldn’t allow me to flourish in my fashion.  Nevertheless, if you keep your vision intact, there is nothing that they can do to destroy you.  And yes, you drift in that vast ocean, but also, there are endless possibilities where one can even visualize an Atlantis in front of them.