Sway

Monday, May 23, 2022

I woke up hearing a recording of “Sway, ” which was being played on a car parked outside my bedroom window.  I believe it was Rosemary Clooney, not in the car, but her recorded version of the song.  Who was located in the vehicle was a couple making out.  This is not odd, but I found it a tad strange to see and hear something like this at 9:00 a.m.   At first, I presumed that they were teenagers, but I could see clearly that it was not the case; it was a middle-aged couple.

I have nothing against middle-aged couples showing affection in a parked car, but I think the mixture of it being morning and Rosemary Clooney is an odd juxtaposition.  I usually wouldn’t interfere in another couple’s private affairs, but I felt it wasn’t right for them to do this under my window.  I got dressed as quickly as possible, and went down to the street, towards their car, to let them understand that they woke me up.  As I approached the vehicle, the gentleman pulled a gun on me.  I said, ‘wow. ” And he said ‘yes.’

She got out, and she had a switchblade in her hand.  She wasn’t pointing it at me but just letting me know she also had her toy.  They told me to go back to my house.  I turned around and walked up to my stairs.  I was also concerned that they followed me up as well.  Once they came in, I asked them if they wanted some coffee.  They said yes and then told me to go to the kitchen.  He asked me to prepare coffee for him and his sweet.  He also requested that his coffee be served black and that she wanted cream and sugar.  I told him that I had only skim milk and no cream.  Would that be OK?  He paused for a whole minute while looking at her as she looked at me, and I looked at both of them and his gun.  He finally said, “sure.” I asked him if he minded if I had a cup as well because I hadn’t had my morning coffee, and my brain didn’t work fully till I had my first cup.   He said, “sure. ”

 I have a table in the kitchen, and we all sat around it while drinking coffee and not saying a word to each other.  Meanwhile, as he sips his coffee, he keeps his gun aimed toward yours.   He asked if I had a bedroom.  I said, “sure.” He said, “My girlfriend and I will use your bedroom.” He and she got up and told me to get up and lead them to the bedroom.  I showed him the room, he watched her, and she looked at him and said, “this will do.” He asked if that was the closet. I said, “yes.” He then asked if I had a portable turntable. I said, “yes.” He then had me bring the turntable to the bedroom.  He then requested I set it up for him. I did so.  He then approached me with his gun and whispered if I had had any recordings by Artie Shaw.   Yes, a strange request, but by chance (I think), I had the complete recordings of Artie Shaw, put out by RCA Records in the early 1980s.  He requested “Dancing in the Dark, ” which is my favorite recording by Shaw, oddly enough.  He didn’t seem interested in my opinion of the song or recording.   He asked me to locate the music on the vinyl disk and put it on the turntable.

He then demanded that I go into the closet.  I did so and heard the lock turn.   I listened to the music a few minutes later and then muffled sounds from both.  I have to presume that what I could listen to while they were making love was him reciting lines from “Goodbye Moon.” Even though it was challenging to listen to because of the music and their lovemaking sounds, I heard “goodnight room, goodnight cow jumping over the moon, goodnight light.” Quite a remarkable man, I thought to myself.  Then I heard nothing.   The record finished, and I can listen to it repeating the end grooves.
The ‘click-click’ almost sounded sinister when I suddenly heard the lock turning.  He told me, “you can come out now.”  I did so, and I noticed that the bed was made.  I looked at the bed, looked at them, and looked back towards the bed.  I said, “thank you.” He said, “no problem.” He then had me go to the living room.  She didn’t say a word to me, but she left the room to return to her car.  She started the engine, and he then looked at me and said, “goodbye.” I nodded my head as a goodbye, and he left the room, holding the gun aimed at me, and walked backwards to the door.  He opened the door with one hand and left.